Getting my heart broken was the best thing that ever happened to me.

I have been in more relationships than the average 25 year old girl. I kind of got hooked from the first real boyfriend I had, (shout out to Garret). I soon realized the joy and comfort one can get from being in love with another human being and before I knew it, I was addicted. As time went on, I dated numerous guys who will always have a special place in my heart, (okay, maybe not all of them)... but they all at least taught me something different and unique and for that, I am grateful.
Last year, I got broken up with from a guy who I thought could possibly be "the one." Although I have been in a love a couple times (I am a total believer in that we have multiple soul mates). I was pretty devastated and heartbroken. He was older, he was smarter, he worked hard, I enjoyed his family, he was attractive, he was a cool dude.. so, he must have hung the moon, I thought. Well, I'm here to tell you- it's a year later and being broken up with was the greatest gift God has personally ever given to me.
Although it has been an adjustment going from girlfriend to just girl, it has been ridiculously amazing. It was definitely a transition and I somewhat was left to reinvent myself. But, I have.  I have grown into this independent, tough, kind of badass (if you don't mind me saying) woman. I have taken my career more seriously, realized the importance of being successful as a young professional, and have experienced things I never would have if I would have consistently been in a relationship my whole life. I started a professional's group here, helped put together a women's bible study, signed up for piano lessons, I'm about to sign up for improv classes, made tons of friends, worked hard in real estate, and that's just the beginning of it.
Although all of those things are awesome- the best thing I actually learned from getting my heart broken is self-made happiness. It is realizing that I never needed anyone else. My happiness is something that comes within, it's something that I create, it's not dependent on someone, their mood or actions, it's all my choice. That's a ridiculously freeing feeling. Now, I never have to settle for someone who is just great on paper..but I know I can wait to be with someone who emotionally will stand up and give me all I deserve, someone that I can be proud of. This is not hating or looking down on relationships, trust me, I will always be in love with love. This personally has just been a chapter in my life that I will never forget, and that nothing or no one could have given to me, but myself. It taught me how to be on my own, how to really love myself, as well as my friends and family. It allowed me to be somewhat selfish and begin the dreams I have for my life.  It helped me figure out who I wanted to surround myself with, and it ultimately let me take the back seat and just enjoy the ride of the unknown.
I hope you find this woman. You must realize that she is in there knocking at your heart and soul and is begging to bang down the door of fear, resentment, a hurt heart, a broken spirit, whatever it may be, she wants to overcome all of the burdens in your life. Relationship or not, I encourage you to find her- she is in there, and she is a badass just waiting to come out and surprise the hell out of you.

So thank you homeboy for breaking me free, you threw me in the water thinking i'd drown, but I'm finally swimming.

 

 

 

  





 

 

 

 

   

 

 

  

 

 

 

 

  

"I design clothes because I don’t want women to look all innocent and naïve…I want woman to look stronger…I don’t like women to be taken advantage of…I don’t like men whistling at women in the street. I think they deserve more respect. I like men to keep their distance from women, I like men to be stunned by an entrance. I’ve seen a woman get nearly beaten to death by her husband. I know what misogyny is … I want people to be afraid of the women I dress."

Alexander McQueen

This video will move you. As women, we can all relate somewhat.
Lyrics below. 

"I was in the winter of my life, and the men I met along the road were my only summer.
At night I fell asleep with visions of myself, dancing and laughing and crying with them.
Three years down the line of being on an endless world tour, and my memories of them were the only things that sustained me, and my only real happy times.
I was a singer - not a very popular one,
I once had dreams of becoming a beautiful poet, but upon an unfortunate series of events saw those dreams dashed and divided like a million stars in the night sky that I wished on over and over again, sparkling and broken.
But I didn't really mind because I knew that it takes getting everything you ever wanted, and then losing it to know what true freedom is.
When the people I used to know found out what I had been doing, how I'd been living, they asked me why - but there's no use in talking to people who have home.
They have no idea what it's like to seek safety in other people - for home to be wherever you lay your head.
I was always an unusual girl.
My mother told me I had a chameleon soul, no moral compass pointing due north, no fixed personality; just an inner indecisiveness that was as wide and as wavering as the ocean...
And if I said I didn't plan for it to turn out this way I'd be lying...
Because I was born to be the other woman.
Who belonged to no one, who belonged to everyone.
Who had nothing, who wanted everything, with a fire for every experience and an obsession for freedom that terrified me to the point that I couldn't even talk about it, and pushed me to a nomadic point of madness that both dazzled and dizzied me."